March 5, 2004

Hi! My name is Tracy Reynolds. I was inspired by your website to compose a little chemistry parody myself. It is based on the Alanis Morrissette song "Ironic".

"IONIC"

A millilitre of potassium phosphate
Reacted and turned into a precipitate
It's a bunch of electrolytes in your solution
It's the wrong molarity because of too much dillution

And isn't it ionic, don't you think?

CHORUS:

It's like your brain moving slow as a snail
It's an answer key when you've already failed
It's that critical lecture on which you just had to bail
And who would've thought? It figures.

Mr. Play-it-safe was afraid to balance equations
He took a deep breath and tackled one involving redox titration
It took him a whole damn hour just to figure it out
And as his grade crashed down he just wanted to shout

Teachers have a funny way of not helping you out
When you're in lab, everything's going wrong
And your experiment blows up in your face

More information when you're already confused
Needing a beaker and the last one is being used
It's like 10,000 moles when all you need is a gram
It's finding out you have a test tomorrow and having to cram

And isn't it ionic?